xXx~w3LcOm3 2 x|aOy|'s bLoG~xXx
i enjoy staying at home... maybe is cause i can be myself at home... nothing to hind... alone at my room... can laugh when i wish to... can cry when i need to...
i really don't know wat i want now... every night can't stop thinking of u... everynight can't don't cry to slp... hated that feeling... hated that u enter my life (giving lots of happiness), and left my life (giving me so much pain)... i really don't know i know u is gd or bad?? if don't know u, i won't know life can be so happy with lot of love u given me, can't forget the days you given me lots of happiness.... but also can't forget how u left me without any reasonable reason... just that we r not suitable... then may i ask, wat is call suitable?? there is lots of thing i don't know... am i a lousy gf?? but i am trying my best in everything to let u be happy... maybe we wasn't meant to be... maybe we r just together to learn relationship....
i don't know... i am trying to let go everything... yet i can't.... the memories is there... the pain is there.... its not easy... somemore have to face u in the morning when u don't even wish to face or talk to me.... i hated it.... my working pal say u two break?? i say yup... she say she don't know y i have choosen him... he is not gd... i tell her i am his first gf... she say aiyo, u kanna cheated aready la... he sure lie you one... when i heard that wat some ppl think of him, i really can't believe wat i heard... so he is that bad in those gal eyes... so i am the stupiq one who can't see that right??
i wants to find back my happiness... i want back my normal life... the usual carefree me... everyday happy go lucky... but............... i just can't.... how????????? its almost one month... yet i can't let go... how am i going on?? time?? is it that wat i need?? but i am getting worst day by day... so wat the hell it is... haix....
i try to not to think, n to forget... but it fail... cause there is too much memories... every thing surrounding make me think of him... yup, 18 days aready after the break up... yet i can't... every one is coming to me n ask y?? they won't believe we will end just so soon... today saw him again... we r the most familar strange(in chinese - zui sou xi de mo shen ren)... we didn't faced each other... didn't talk... just an escape again... well, let see we can escape til when la hor... well... sat 1230pm offical off work... but lots of work loaded for me to clear... stay til 530pm... just like a normal working day, just that the office is more quiter... after that, go friend house release stress... happy hour... woohoo.... enjoyed, played, chatted... missed those day, but there is something missing... there is something i can't put down, i just escape when they ask me break up aready?? y?? everything la... ppl break up, still can continue ask la hor... heart still pain one lo... haix... i really don't know til when can i forget abt it... i don't think so soon... maybe there is thing i still can't let go... heart still pain, missed him, yup... am i crazy?? maybe... haha... but i know its over... O-V-E-R alright, 12am back home... so sleepy now... going to slp... night..
nothing special... stressful week as month end closing is on thur... from monday til wed was like everyday working late til 8pm, reach home was almost 9pm n i having my dinner at that time... omg... thur closing was diam shit... don't know wat happen to me... i know it won't be him to be the reason to why i keep can't do it right... but i really don't know... did twice redo again n again... then still can't make it... then call shi fu help then everything when ok... no mood to eat dinner after that... just grab some snack... 730pm closed... so reach home was 9pm quite early for month end la... ok alright... wat happen on thur morning was... after the break up, thur was the first time he working morning... he was like nv see me, i also don't dare to talk to him... we both just escape by acting busy... luckily yogen understanding, help me ask him got E....... or not... then tell me only yogen have... later yogen come up, ask me wat happen, really break ah?? do i still luv him?? nothing can be done?? or need him to talk to him?? i say don't need la... he won't tell you either... how yogen know abt break up?? is yogen go ask him how is u n your gf?? he say don't have aready, he call yogen don't ask me... omg... but yogen say he will ask me... haha... diam him... maybe is yogen ask me do i still like him?? that make my heart little confuse... although i know it wasn't gotta to continue aready... today same thing... morning he act busy, abby pass me her packet n his packet... he can continue to escape la... i really yesterday thot i will gotta to face it... don't like escape, its so paisei lo... but... if that his choice, wat can i do?? i always left without any choice since we r together til now... maybe is i let him too much ba... oh yah... diam him, his friendster write hope i will find my mrs right soon... its like wat the hell la... but i don't think he can find one soon, if so, so wat?? if he really know how to treat a gal right, i won't get hurt aready... i can say he don't know... time is most important, if he can't give me time last time, so u think he can give time to the new gal?? he got lots to learn la... watever... tomolo n sunday off... yeah... resting day... monday work til sat next week... omg... stressful again?? maybe not... haha... but this month 4 week til next month 2 week got 3 continue working sat... its gotta be hell diam tired again... haix... thats life, thats my work, wat can i say?? nothing can be said... haha...
~pRoFiLe~
~d3tAiLs~
~HaPpInEsS~
~Y~
~N~
~wIsHlIsT~
~eVeNt~
***x|aOy| aKa SuKi***
***07 JuNe 1987***
***19 YeAr$ oLd***
***BiShAn iTe***
xiaoyi_suki@yahoo.com
***a gAl hU dOn'T b3li3v3 iN eVeRlAsTiNg LuV***
***a Fr|eNdLy, Ou+gOiNg, FuNnY, wAt3v3r Attitude, hApPy-Go-LuCkY PeRsOn***
***a CrAzY FaNs***
wo zhi xiang yong wo zhe yi bei zi qu ai ta
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***PpL hU g3t ClOs3 w|tH u CaUs3 tHeY hAv3 iNt3nDt|oN***
***pass my higher nitec accounting course n get a well-pay job***
***2 be able to shake hand with xiaodao, gino***
***2 be able to dare to talk with xiaodao, gino***
***2 be able to take pic with xiaodao, gino, kenji***
***my name 2 be call by xiaodao, gino***
***to be happy everyday***
***love life no more pain***
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